Tuesday, December 20, 2011
Cheeseburger Wasteland
Why isn't there an In-N-Out between Pinole and East Oakland?! What the hell? North Oakland, West Oakland, the Lake Merritt neighborhoods, Berkeley, Emeryville, Albany...this whole fucking place is crawling with burger eaters. There's so many goddamn French fries...I'm constantly having to make my way through smushed up French fries scattered all over the goddamn sidewalks; it actually slows me down. (One could easily slip and fall on that shit...totally fuckin' dangerous.) In-N-Out'd make a fortune here! We love special sauce. Are they stupid? Or is it some sort of a Christian thing (I've heard that they're owned and operated by fundies; I've even seen scriptures cited in tiny print on the bottoms of their cups), some faith-based scruple that keeps them away because the East Bay is pig Latin for the Beast? But if that were the case then the East Oakland and San Leandro In-N-Outs wouldn't make any sense. So what the hell is going on?
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ReplyDeleteThere is a restaurant in Fullerton (with other OC locations) called "Flame Broiler". Same principle - like the In-N-Out of teriyaki. Simple menu, exceptional food, and bible tracts fucking everywhere. They even play fundamentalist radio in each restaurant, just to further inundate every possible sense with Jesus and burning meat. Yet they will only open locations as far north as La Habra -- never LA. Let's face it -- there's a Chik-Fil-A in La Habra, so it's obviously in the "fundie safety deserving of good (or "God's") teriyaki.
ReplyDeleteWe're coming to the Bay Area (staying in SF) with day trips to Oakland and Berkeley, so we'll investigate this further.
San Francisco (or, as I like to call it, the West Bay) has its very own In-N-Out (near Fisherman's Wharf). And then just over the border into Daly City, the town immediately south of SF, there's another In-N-Out. So it's basically an area about 60% the size of Oakland, and yet they get two In-N-Outs! It's total bullshit. I don't even think those West Bay people enjoy cheeseburgers and fries. Everything's super fancy over there...buncha candy-asses. I think they eat sushi and tapas and fusion and stuff like that.
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