...out of the worm-hole, into the fire!

Hey Worm,

What qualifies you to offer people advice? If you have any credentials as a therapist or counselor (which I seriously doubt), you might want to post them. You’re a worm. You crawl around in holes. What would you know about anything?

Signed,
an anonymous seeker of competent, professional advice


The Worm sez: Sticks and stones can’t break The Worm’s bones (it has none), but your cruel words can make it cry and feel ashamed of itself. Is that what you want? The Worm does not think that that is what you really want. Perhaps if you try then you can learn to love The Worm and to be loved by The Worm. Perhaps there’s nothing wrong with you that you can’t fix yourself; maybe you do not need the help of any trained therapist. The Worm recommends that you discontinue your search for professional advice, that you isolate yourself at home, and that you derive your psychological and emotional wellness from a steadfast refusal to communicate with anyone, especially The Worm, by means of the internet or otherwise. As Doctors Freud and Jung both said, “In silence lies the power to heal all wounds,” and as Dr. Phil once said, “Be your own physician, and in silence heal yourself." The Buddha taught us that our happiness falls softly as does a pin. The Worm suggests that you sit quietly and listen for it to drop. Sshhh.

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So sayeth The Worm.